At the last Women, Wine and Well-Being , we discussed how failure moves you forward. Yep...FAILURE.
Our society places so much value on success. We are taught that anything less than an A is “bad”; “do it right or don’t do it at all” or that you look foolish if you fail. This thinking steers us away from beginning new things and is very limiting.
I recognized this pattern in myself. I played it safe and kept my goals within reach to avoid any pain or embarrassment. I was just failing ahead of time which caused a different kind of pain. The pain of knowing that I am capable of so much more yet staying stuck in the familiar.
Yes, failing is not fun. But many of us, needlessly, pile on extra suffering with the way we think about it. We make it mean more than it is. I know I did. I now think differently and know that there is tremendous benefit in missing a goal, coming up short, losing, and breaking down.
Here is what you gain when you fail:
Valuable Information: We gain wisdom, experience and understanding. In short, we learn what doesn’t work and use that information to course correct.
Strength: Think of a baby learning to walk. They get stronger by continually getting themselves up. We get stronger every time we fall and get back up.
Resilience: Resilience is our capacity to recover. The only way to get better at resilience is to experience adversity…period.
Confidence: Confidence is our willingness to fail in front of others. Confidence does not come from knowing how to do something. It comes from the learning. One of my yoga teachers said you have to show up and suck in order to show up and be stellar.
So much more was covered last month. But, I hope this provides you with enough inspiration to get out of your comfort zone. Just know if you do, you and your life will become bigger. Really, it’s not about the goal itself…it’s about the person you become by accomplishing the goal.
Although, we have many weeks of winter left. March 1st symbolizes growth and possibility for me. How about you? Are you looking to create something new in your life? Do you have a goal that that you want to make a reality? If so, please join me on March 7th for the next WWW where we will discuss goal setting and getting. I will outline the psychology behind goals and provide you a framework that will set you up for success. Only 10 spots left. Register here.